By Melisa De Seguirant, LPC, LMFT ~ Nov 2024
Managing Trauma & Triggers
Most of us are familiar with the basic trauma responses… fight, flight, fawn, freeze. But what is trauma? How do we navigate our own trauma responses? Can trauma be healed?
Scroll for some ideas to get you started, then continue the post below…
Let’s take a moment to ground our understanding of the different trauma responses (fight, flight, fawn, freeze) in a straightforward model of nervous system activation.
The window of tolerance, first developed by Dr. Dan Siegel, describes the zone in which our nervous system can effectively process stressors and continue to function optimally. When our window of tolerance is wide, stressors may come our way but we are able to tolerate them and “shake off” any distress with relative ease.
Outside of the window of tolerance lie the differing zones of dysregulation. Sometimes stressors impact our nervous systems so intensely that we are pushed out of our window of tolerance, into either hyper or hypo-arousal. Fight & flight responses are associated with hyper-arousal, while fawn & freeze are associated with hypo-arousal.
One key point about the window of tolerance, is that the size of the window actually changes. Trauma can shrink the window so that things that we would otherwise be able to handle send us quickly into nervous system dysregulation. Therapy, nervous system healing and taking time to resource ourselves and ensure we are meeting our basic needs can expand our window of tolerance, helping us to cope better with stressors over time.
Next time you are feeling dysregulated, consider where you are in relation to your window of tolerance? Are you in hyperarousal and needing to engage strategies to ground and calm your energy? Are you in hypoarousal and needing support re-engaging and coming back online with the present moment?
Talk with a therapist about strategies to better navigate dysregulation, and expand your window of tolerance.
When traumatized, there is a marked need to slow down and prioritize basic needs and functioning.
Sometimes the impulse is to cognitively deep-dive trying to think our way out of a trauma response. Most often what we need is to turn off our brains and attend to our bodies.
Stop studying today. Reduce stimulation. Rest.
Hydrate. Eat. Cry. Scream.
Laugh. Exercise. Stretch. Hug. Embrace.
Sleep.
Move slowly, but move.
Ground & resource yourself.
Analyze and process later.
Unclench your jaw.
Breathe.
While it is helpful to learn how to recognize and manage our trauma responses, sometimes we can go too far into the direction of vilifying them as if they are our nervous system betraying us in some way.
In reality, our trauma responses are our nervous system’s way of trying to protect us from harm.
Instead of fighting against what your body is doing, learn to work with it. Radical acceptance here might look like accepting that optimal functioning is not a reasonable goal while traumatized or triggered, and basic needs are instead the thing to focus on.
Thank your body for the feedback about your level of safety or perceived safety, and respond accordingly. Resource yourself by tending to your body, slowing down, and reconnecting with others if you can.
When your body goes into a trauma response, it’s not time to analyze or judge, it’s time to listen.
When the trauma response has ended, then you can go about the business of analyzing it, unpacking it with a trauma-focused care provider and building strategies to reduce triggers and expand your window of tolerance.
Be gentle with yourself.
Many trauma-focused therapy modalities include a stage of integration, during which more adaptive narratives about the experiences that led to traumatization are explored and reinforced.
This happens after the initial phases of trauma work which include building capacity to regulate, widening the window of tolerance, and slowly digesting the trauma response through intentional somatic work.
Adaptive narratives are not about gaslighting or minimizing the harm done, or even fostering gratitude for the experience. They are about locating the internal resources and strengths present, even at the time of harm. They are about constructing a more adaptive lens to view the experience from, that allows the person to move forward more freely and less hypervigilant about potential recurrence. They are about instilling more confidence in oneself, and rewriting any limiting or problematic beliefs that have been holding the person back as a result of trauma.
They are about reminding people of the power that they hold within, and reconnecting them to it.
#trauma #triggers #PTSD #traumahealing #traumawork #mentalhealth
Melisa is a licensed psychotherapist practicing in the states of Oregon and California, and specializing in working with individuals within the queer, polyamorous/ ethically non-monogamous and neurodivergent communities.